Thursday, January 23, 2014

And Then....

Number 17

Number 18

Okay, I am up to Number 19, way behind probably, not sure, haven't gone searching to see where everyone else is, too busy trying to get to my studio.  Anyhow, here are two done over some sketches I found the other day while looking for some small panels or canvasses to work on.  I remember doing some black and white sketches on small canvas, and masonite, boards because I thought that would be pretty clever.  Hey, it's a long time ago, I may say I had a big intelligent plan in place, but really, I just had an idea, an aaaaHA moment, and got some photos and sat down and did some sketches with black paint and turps, I remember doing it, I forgot I had them until I found them, but when I saw them, I remembered it.  These two are from a trip to San Francisco about 1990.  I thought it was in the 80s, but my husband pointed out to me we didn't drive any further south until we got our Aerostar Van in 1989, couldn't argue with that one, I knew he was right.  I probably do have photos I could have used as reference, but I didn't do that, decided I neither had the time or desire to sit and go through shoe box after shoe box of photos, done enough of that lately, I must get on with the painting, just paint over the drawing, right.  Once into the painting, I became very aware that my sketch was not great, guess I fancied myself as some splash artist during that moment, and my sketch was a direct rendering from believing the photo was true, true in proportions, etc.  As you can see, not so much.  But, since this is a one day thing, I had no choice to but to paint the damn thing, just paint the damn thing, Mary Ann, no one will come at you with their perspective bible and correct you, and even if they do, who cares, right.

I was thinking to myself today, that so far, I haven't thrown any work out the window, or me off a bridge, during this 30 paintings in 30 day commitment I took on for myself.  I have to stop calling it a challenge, too far behind to say I am challenging anyone, besides, it's not a race, right.  ...where was I?  so far..oh right.  So far, I am feeling pretty okay with my one shot efforts.  Not one of them has been touched the next day, they get photographed and posted right then and there, that's it.  Not once have I panicked and cried and run under the bed saying.. "I can't, I can't..I can't post that, that sucks, I suck, I hate that, I just can't.." you know, that kind of thing when we feel pressured to tap dance before we tie up our shoes (oh, how eloquent)  No, I must say, all 18 of them have been a one go, kept painting until I decided to say "okay, done" and onto the next phase, which again is getting easier and easier.  Routine, not a big deal, no time to second guess, just do it.  I no longer take 50 bad photos, I take about 3.  Uh huh, I also use a tripod without tangling my legs around and end up on the floor, so smart am I. I also can quickly go to my computer and upload the images and find them within minutes and not six hours like it once took.  Yes, I am quick and clever, done, no fuss, no agonizing wailing for help from God.  I have come so far.

As for the actual art work I post, again, and go figure, I'm okay.  I can post on Facebook and not go through 10 sticks of deodorant for the profuse sweating, I don't sweat, I'm okay.  I don't sit on the computer and wait for applause that may never come.  No, I am casual and cool, go and plan for the next one, or make dinner, or clean the bathroom, keep moving.  I do admit, the feedback in FB is uplifting.  It really is, and I'm not shouting at anyone to "Go put your glasses does NOT, it SUCKS!" no, I am calm and happy, grateful and well mannered, taking the compliments with grace, and joyfully joining in with the fun cracks on my "non-representational" and abstracts in good humour.  I am pretty proud of myself, actually.  

But not for the art work, it's all the other stuff I was doing that I wanted to fix.  My art?  Well, it is what it is, and I am always happiest when I am painting, the rest of this being an "artist bit" is a whole other story, but tonight, I feel pretty good about that too.

Now what will I paint for Number 19....maybe a self portrait....

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